Question from a reader:

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the community aspect of prepping. I used to think, ok, just need a full pantry, water, guns, meds, etc and I’m good. Those kinds of things are a great for the short term, but it’s scary how many people I’ve talked to that think they’ll be able to just lone wolf scavenge/raid other people for food or something similar. I can’t imagine that plan would make one very popular among whoever is building a community in the aftermath. I’ve been thinking less that I need to become a one-man society with a farm and machine shop and personal pharmacy and more that I need to develop useful skills I can bring to the table and network with others who have complimentary skills. Have thoughts/reading recs/advice on this kind of thing?

There is a lot going on here, more than I could answer in a paragraph or two.

If you read our introduction to dependency loops, you’ve hopefully been thinking about them and which ones you can close, even partially. But as I cautioned, it can become discouraging when you realize just how many there are and how few you can fully close.

I’ve also heard from many of our readers who live in cities, and as such there are many dependency loops they can’t close because they don’t have the space or natural resources. (Though you may be able to do more than you think. Check out Paradise Lot, a book I’ve mentioned a couple of times in Unprepared.)

But there is an alternative to closing dependency loops: making them smaller. For better or worse, we live in a global economy, which means our dependency loops wrap around the globe. Russia invades Ukraine and suddenly farmers can’t afford fertilizer. China locks down Shanghai and six months later you can’t fix your car because you can’t source the part.

What if instead of closing those dependency loops, you could shrink them so they’re smaller? So instead of each of your dependency loops encompassing the whole world, the most important ones only wrap around your neighborhood?

That’s where community comes in. Instead of obsessing over doing everything yourself, make connections with locals who can help you fill in those loops.

No One Is an Island

There’s a lot of debate over the terms self-dependence and self-reliance. Some reject them outright, while others argue that they don’t mean depending entirely upon yourself. In any case, total self-dependence has never been a thing.

Trade has always been a key to human civilization. In the olden days, a village would have farmers alongside tradesmen like blacksmiths and woodworkers. No one person was expected to do everything.

Even the rustic mountain men — the very symbol of American self-reliance — bought goods from traders. As fur traders, the mountain men were as much a part of the supply chain as anyone else.

Richard Proenneke, the man who famously built his own cabin in Alaska and lived alone for 30 years, depended on the occasional supply drop being flown in.

I encourage you to learn as many useful skills as you can so you can be as self-reliant as possible. But you can ultimately only do so much. There are hard limits on your time, capital, brainpower, and physical ability.

For instance, I cannot produce salt. I don’t live near a salt mine or the ocean. So I have to stockpile it. I could produce my own sugar in the form of honey, but I’d have to dedicate the time, space, and knowledge to keep bees, which I don’t have time for right now. The same goes for cooking fat. The rabbits I raise won’t produce much, and I don’t have space for cows. I might find room for pigs, but that’s another project I can’t fit into my schedule right now.

The first step is recognizing which dependency loops you can close and which ones you can’t. The next step is meeting other people who can help you make those loops smaller. Finally — and this may take a long time — figure out what niche you can fill that others can’t, so you are of value to the community.

Cultivate a Useful Social Circle

The best way to shrink the size of your dependency loops is to make connections with local people who offer useful services. Identify the dependency loops you struggle to close, and for each one, you want “a guy” for that. (It doesn’t have to be a guy, but people always like saying, “Yeah, I got a guy for that.”)

For instance, I have not had time to start enough seeds for this gardening season. Partially because I’m so busy with Unprepared and other projects, but also because we’re growing a two-acre garden on my in-law’s property, so I need a lot more seedlings than I know how to produce. Thankfully, we have a “guy” (actually a woman) for that.

I raise rabbits, and I’ve made it a point to make connections with several rabbit breeders in my area. If I have a problem (and I’ve had many), I have several folks who I can ask for advice. Likewise, if I need a new rabbit for breeding, I have several people I can potentially buy from.

The nice thing about making these connections is they open up additional connections. For instance, I need a gutter on my building so I can set up rain barrels to collect water. I know nothing about gutters and have no business on a ladder. But as it happens, my plant lady, who happens to be married to one of my rabbit guys, lives across from a guy who does gutters. So I potentially have a gutter guy.

Another example: I saw a guy outside of Tractor Supply selling rabbits. I struck up a conversation with him and learned a lot about rabbitry (farmers love talking about what they do and they’re usually more than happy to share their knowledge). I visited his home and while I was there buying a rabbit, I learned a lot about water collection systems and animal trapping. So now I got another rabbit guy, a rain barrel guy, and an animal trapping guy.

The thing about folks like us is we tend to pick up lots of useful skills. So if you make a contact for one thing, they may fill needs you’ll have later. Our rabbit guy/plant lady couple? They also have a milk cow, so we buy milk from them. They raise chickens, goats, and pigs as well. They also grow a lot of medicinal herbs. We’re incredibly lucky to have such folks as friends, but they’re not as rare as you think.

So how do you get a “guy?” That’s the tricky part. You’re going to have to do some legwork. Some good places to start:

• Online groups for homesteaders, craftsmen, and preppers, preferably in your local area. As much as I hate Facebook, it’s a good source for local contacts.

• Farmer’s markets and craft fairs.

• Go to events and conferences aimed at self-reliance types. The upcoming FloteFest and the Tennesee Homestead Weekend are good examples.

• Some farms have public events like farm tours and herb walks. These are great ways to make connections.

Building a preparedness network takes time and effort.

Band of Preppers

As you build up your contacts, you may find that your social circle changes dramatically, and I would say for the better.

I got on the self-reliance train well before my wife and was considered the “weirdo” in our social group. Once my wife eventually got on board, those old friends drifted away as we gained new friends, and a couple of years later, our social circle looked very different.

I have a lot to say on why people hate preppers, but one simple reason is people like comfort. They want to shop, watch the latest movies and shows, and play video games. They want to chill and being reminded of the world’s cruel realities is harshing their mellow.

Our social circle slowly evolved from being surrounded by comfort people to being surrounded by those who embrace self-sufficiency. And the same may happen to you as well.

I’m not suggesting that you make friendships for merely utilitarian ends, but I have found that folks like us tend to make fast friends because we have a lot of common ground. And many of us have been rejected by “normies.”

This can be difficult, but it’s not a bad thing. You’re the sum of the people you surround yourself with. If you want to be more self-reliant, you need to be around self-reliant people.

Get to Know Your Neighbors

Here’s a simple thing many people miss: get to know your neighbors. Sorry to be obvious, but they are the closest people to you and the most likely to be able to help or need help.

“But my neighbors are lousy people!” OK, that’s good information! Meet more people on your street. Figure out who’s worth getting to know and who’s worth avoiding (and who may cause trouble in an emergency). Your neighbors aren’t only your closest allies (or enemies), but if they’ve been in the area a long time they can be a rich source of local knowledge that you can’t find on Google, like where the fishing spots are or where you can find a good welder.

Hyperlocal knowledge is invaluable. Take any opportunity you can to learn about the resources in your area, whether natural or manmade. What kind of trees grow around you? Where are the water springs? Who are the people to keep an eye on?

That kind of knowledge is especially handy when you’re starting a garden. Old-timers know the kinds of pests you can expect, what sort of weeds to watch for, what the native soil needs, and when it’s safe to plant.

Don’t Forget Your Family

If you’re on good terms with your family, they can also be a big part of your support network, even if they don’t prep or think you’re crazy for doing so. I was really fortunate to get a flat tire mere feet away from my father-in-law’s workshop.

And if they think you’re nuts for prepping, keep working on them. Until recently, my in-laws thought my wife’s homesteading adventures were insane, though they were usually willing to help us when we needed it. But rising food prices and mainstream reports of food shortages triggered my father-in-law to buy a “brand new” tractor (from the 1950s) to plant a large garden for this summer.

Be Leery of Prepping Groups

There’s a lot of talk about in-person preparedness-focused groups, like Mutual Assistance Groups. I’m sure there are some that work well, but I’m not a fan of the concept for the following reasons:

• You can’t force strong connections. There’s no guarantee that the group would band together in an emergency instead of just being everyone for themselves.

• Let’s be honest, prepping can attract some unhinged folks, and you don’t want to be yoked up with them.

• Formal groups introduce politics, which introduces potential trouble.

• Many of the best-prepared people don’t think of themselves as preppers.

I’m not against groups or clubs! But for a group to work well, it has to have some common bond or mission beyond individual self-preservation. However, there are organizations you could join that could be useful. Some examples:

• Churches and other religious organizations. I’m not saying to get religion to be better prepared, but if you are a believer, a good church is perhaps the fastest way to grow a support network. If you already attend a church and have a good rapport with other members, you could start an assistance group within the church with others who share similar values.

• Ham radio clubs. These aren’t strictly prepping-focused, but they’re usually prepping friendly and may hold events like emergency drills and first-aid courses, or host sub-groups like ARES and RACES.

• Beekeeping and other agriculture-related clubs.

• Neighborhood watch groups.

• Hunting and gun clubs, but beware anything that feels like a militia. I’m fine with militias — in theory — but they often attract criminal elements (or federal agents encouraging criminal behavior). However, you may have something like the Tennessee State Guard that’s a legitimate organization with your type of people.

But being a member of a club doesn’t guarantee a strong support network. You have to do the work of being friendly, making small talk, and forming those connections.

What Everyone Needs to Provide for Themselves

While it’s good to have people to count on, you don’t want to be a burden. When push comes to shove, you’re on your own for some things like:

• Stored calories

• Water

• Tools

• Medicine and medical supplies

• Weapons and ammo (if you partake)

This doesn’t mean you can’t borrow a tool or a cup of sugar occasionally, but you need to have the fundamentals down.

You also need to have skills you can bring to the table so you add value back to the circle. That could be all matter of things: accounting, butchering, carpentry, tractor repair, whatever. Make yourself useful. And it’s even better if you have a unique skill so you can be somebody’s “guy.”

What I bring to my circle are computer skills. To many people, I’m the “computer guy.” You more than likely have a unique skill or area of expertise, whether you realize it or not.

Being a Murderous Thief is Not a Good Option

I often see comments like, “I’m not prepping. If things go south, I’ll just use my guns to get what I need.” Here’s an example:

It’s an interesting admission because what these people are actually saying is, “At heart, I am a murderous thief who would rather steal from other people than make my own preparations.”

Even if you don’t take morals into account. it’s a bad plan. What if a disaster hits your area but society hasn’t completely collapsed? Are you going to go rob people in broad daylight and risk going to prison? There was law and order even in Mad Max — who was a cop, by the way.

Not to mention that an army marches on its stomach. You’re not going to be in great shape for banditry if you’re hungry and dehydrated. And you’re also assuming the people you plan to rob are unarmed, which is unlikely. Plus, they’re going to have home-field advantage. Showing up at someone’s doorstep with a gun is a good way to wind up dead.

It’s cliche, but you’ll attract more flies with honey than vinegar. Most people want to help, especially if you show up ready to be helpful. Start building your network now and learn how you can be useful to your community.